Oh wise and powerful ouija-fridge, tell me the worst and most horrible soda that we should all pray never enters this earthly realm. Blue Moxie

One of these headlines frames upholding our constitution as borderline praises-worthy. The other ponders how someone who’s handled sensitive information for decades might handle sensitive information.

Folks, I think we found the false equivalency inherent in the system.

Algorithmic False Equivalence

After extensive research, I can confidently say that all coffee tables currently available fit neatly into two styles: Wayne Manor classic and fuck storage modern.